All parents want only the best for their children. Motherhood Community helps offers guides that parents throughout the parenting process. However, the desire to make life easier for their child, or to protect them, expressed in the wrong form, can sometimes lead to unintentional aggravation of the situation and mental problems in the child in the future. Thus, comforting the upset kid with food, we just do not think about the fact that this can lead to emotional overeating in adulthood, and banning running around the house under the pretext of “so he does not hurt himself,” we simply do not give the stress to splash out. Let’s look at what parents can do to help their emotionally overwhelmed child.
Cut the Behavior, Not the Emotion
There is a difference between experiencing anger and doing something in anger; being sad and throwing a tantrum are also different things. Action, indeed, requires punishment. But phrases like “Get a grip,” “Make a normal face,” and “Don’t cry” are meant to suppress emotions, not change behavior. And this is a big problem: eventually a child may decide as if all bright feelings – even joy, happiness and elation – have no right to splash out, and become withdrawn. Instead, it is necessary to teach the child to distinguish emotions and to name them, so that when stressed, he or she will not panic, but can say what is troubling him or her. Otherwise, a kid growing up won’t be able to show his satisfaction with a 20bet.com prize and not get support needed when experiencing positive emotions.
Eliminate the Need to Rush Your Child
In times of stress, orderliness of life plays a big role. This becomes a kind of bulwark of stability, making a person feel that he is at least in control of something in his life. Therefore, to help your child in an emotionally difficult period, the best thing you can do is to review and create an optimal daily routine. One in which there will be a place for both study and rest, both meeting with friends and warm family dinners. It should be a well-thought-out schedule in which the child will effortlessly and hastily complete all things on time and independently without feeling pressure from you.
Don’t Comfort Your Kid With Gifts
The other extreme in trying to soothe a child is to buy something. This approach also does not solve the problem, does not develop emotional intelligence, and paradoxically makes the child even more unhappy. After all, this relationship makes him think as if mental wounds are being healed by new acquisitions, which, of course, is not the case. In the future, such a child will habitually continue to seek solace in shopping, instead of finding satisfaction in achieving goals, loving, communicating, and expressing feelings.
Don’t Try to Be Around 24/7
At times, sensitive parents may feel their own guilt for their child’s stress. There may be a desire to spend every free minute near the child from now on, so that nothing important is missed again. However, this initially good intention can lead to hyper-overindulgence. As a result, the child could become either spoiled or gutless. It’s important to remember that he needs to learn to be independent and take control of his own life. And to do this, you need to give him the opportunity to be alone with himself.
Don’t Solve All the Problems for Your Child
In an effort to make life easier for a child, parents unwittingly begin to do too much for them. This, in turn, deprives him of the opportunity to acquire his own life skills and become independent. In addition, the habit of doing for your child what he can, in fact, do himself is an unintentional signal that you are not confident in his abilities, which can lead him to learn helplessness. To prevent this from happening, it is better not to commit yourself, but to teach him how to allocate his time effectively and to praise him for his successes.